Jonathan Coulton - Screwed

screwed by jonathan coulton

chord list in order of appearance :

G C A7 D G/C B7 Em Am7 D7 C#m7b5 Dsus4

E – – 3 – – – 0 – – – 0 – – – 2 – – – 3 – – – 2 – – – 0 – – – – 0 – – – 2 – – – – – – – – – – – 3 – – – |
B – – 0 – – – 1 – – – 2 – – – 3 – – – 1 – – – 0 – – – 0 – – – – 1 – – – 1 – – – – 5 – – – – – – 3 – – – |
G – – 0 – – – 0 – – – 0 – – – 2 – – – 0 – – – 2 – – – 0 – – – – 0 – – – 2 – – – – 4 – – – – – – 2 – – – |
D – – 0 – – – 2 – – – 2 – – – 0 – – – 2 – – – 1 – – – 2 – – – – 2 – – – 0 – – – – 5 – – – – – – 0 – – – |
A – – 2 – – – 3 – – – 0 – – – – – – – x – – – 2 – – – 2 – – – – 0 – – – – – – – – 4 – – – – – – – – – – |
E – – 3 – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – 3 – – – – – – – 0 – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – |

i’ve also tabbed out the little fills he does and labelled them
figure 1 and figure 2 .

( fig . 1 ) ( fig . 2 )
E – – – – – – – – – – – – – 3 – – – | – – – – – 3 – – – – 3 – – 3 – – – – |
B – – – – – – – – – 1 – – – 0 – – – | – – – 0 – 1 – – – – 0 – – 0 – – – – |
G – – – – – – – – – 0 – – – 0 – – – | – – – 0 – 0 – – – – 0 – – 0 – – – – |
D – – 0h2p0 – – 2 – – – 0 – – – | – – – 0 – 2 – – – – 0 – – 0 – – – – |
A – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – | – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – |
E – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – | – – – – – – – – – – 3 – – – – – – – |

thats all you need , now heres the song .

G C A7 D
G G/C G

G C A7 D G C A7 D
some dumb indian sold manhattan for seven bucks and a bottle of booze
G C A7 D G C G
went out drinking and came home sober and told his friends the good news

G C A7 D G C A7 D
bernadette saw the virgin mary but no one else could and everyone tried
G C A7 D G C G
all her friends said that she’d gone crazy , she joined a convent and died

B7 Em B7 Em
i’m the indian , i Am bernadette
D G D G
i’m the sucker who doesn’t know it yet
B7 Em B7 Em
i just signed it , i never reviewed
A7 Am7
all the fine print you wrote out
D7
now i guess i’m
G C A7 D
screwed

G G/C G

G C A7 D G C A7 D
indiana jones liked to travel , he took his friend on a treasure hunt trip
G C A7 D G C G
did a favor , threw him the idol but never got back his whip

G C A7 D G C A7 D
boba fett was a bounty hunter , he did his job well , he brought back his man
G C A7 D G C G
he was clutching his unspent money when he fell down a hole in the sand

B7 Em B7 Em
i Am dr . jones , i Am boba fett
D G D G
i’m the sucker who doesn’t know it yet
B7 Em B7 Em
i just signed it , i never reviewed
A7 Am7
all the fine print you wrote out
D7
now i guess i’m
G C A7 D
screwed

G G/C G

C#m7b5 G ( fig . 1 ) C#m7b5 G ( fig . 2 )
it’s bad news for me again , it never ends
C#m7b5 G D Dsus4 D
i got no prize inside my happy meal
C#m7b5 G C#m7b5 G ( fig . 1 )
i got lots of money , i got lots of friends
C#m7b5 G D Dsus4 D
just like meatloaf got a record deal

G C A7 D G C A7 D
alexander graham bell made telephones , his friend watson was out all the time
G C A7 D G C G
called him up just to chat , nobody home , never got back his dime

G C A7 D G C A7 D
once upon a time france was beautiful , had a queen who gave everyone cake
G C A7 D G C G
then the people got mad and killed her dead , took back all they could take

B7 Em B7 Em
i Am graham bell , marie antionette
D G D G
i’m the sucker who doesn’t know it yet
B7 Em B7 Em
i just signed it , i never reviewed
A7 Am7
all the fine print you wrote out
D7
now i guess i’m
G C A7 D
screwed

G G/C G

have fun ,

dave

email : big_dave699@hotmail . com

guitar tab legend :

h – hammer on
p – pull off
x – finger mute ( fretboard hand )