Half Man Half Biscuit - Twydales Lament

( intro F D# F )
A# G C
indicate then you stupid bastard how was i supposed to know
E A# G C E
that you intended to go left , i’m not a mind reader
A# G C
you shall be cast away into the fiery pit and in the fiery pit there are
E ( instr F )
eternal sleeping policemen .
F
i saw a young professional couple playing poohsticks on a cotswold bridge
i watched them walk along the banks of the windrush eating jasmine ice cream
before heading north to warwick arts centre and marianne faithfull , splendid .
i picked up all the elastic bands dropped by the postman on my driveway
and took them up to the pub on a thursday evening
as that’s where he likes to go for the quiz
he believes he is needed for the music round
his friends obviously humour him
anyway , i place myself at a nearby table
and whenever he tries to light up a cigarette
i fire it out of his mouth with one of the elastic bands
which he finds most annoying , most annoying .

( instr F , F A# F , Dm C F ( x2 )
A# F
gouranga gouranga , yes i’ll be happy
Dm C F
when you’ve been arrested for defacing the bridge
A# F
gouranga gouranga , yes i’ll be happy
Dm C F
when you’ve been arrested for defacing the bridge
A# F
gouranga gouranga , yes i’ll be happy
Dm C F
when you’ve been arrested for defacing the bridge
A# F
gouranga gouranga , yes i’ll be happy
Dm C F
when you’ve been arrested for defacing the bridge
A# F
gouranga gouranga , yes i’ll be happy
Dm C F
when you’ve been arrested for defacing the bridge
A# F ( fade out )
gouranga gouranga , yes i’ll be happy