petty sessions
half man half biscuit

C
i stick me big nose in

when i go out

sealed – off car park
G
whats it all about?

i like an altercation with a member of staff
C
that was a ten pound note!

C
i ring up dial – A – pizza
G
i ring up dial – A – pizza
C C7 F
i ring up dial – A – pizza
G C
and say thats not how i would spell hawaiian

C
facebook mum

youtube dad

sea bass , man bag
G
fifty quid to chad

would the congregation like to rise and sing
C
hymn number 252

C
here come the barmy army
G
theyre absolutely crazy
C C7 F
bart , elvis and the baby
G C
kill , kill , kill , stab murder and despatch .