capo 2nd fret
[ intro : ] ( Dm C ) x2 ( Dm F C Dm C Dm C Dm )
Dm
i’ll tell you a story that happened to me
C
one day as i went down to yawl by the sea
Dm F C
the sun it was bright and the day it was warm ,
Dm C Dm C Dm
says i , “a quiet pint wouldn’t do me no harm”
i went in to the barman , and says “give me a stout”
says the barman , “i’m sorry , all the beer is sold out
try whiskey or vodka , ten years in the wood”
says i , “i’ll try cider , i’ve heard that it’s good . ”
[ chorus : ]
Dm
oh never , oh never , oh never again
C
if i live to a hundred or a hundred and ten
Dm F C
’cause i fell to the ground and i couldn’t get up
Dm C Dm C Dm
after drinking a pint of the johnny jump up
after lowering the third , i headed straight for the yard ,
where i bumped into brophy , the big civic guard .
“come here to me , boy – don’t you know i’m the law?”;
well i up with my first , and i shattered his jaw!
he fell to the ground with his knees doubled up ,
but it wasn’t i hit him; ’twas the johnny jump up!
the next thing i saw , down in cork by the lee ,
was a cripple on crutches , and he beckoned to me .
“i’m afraid for my life – i’ll be hit by a car!
would you help me across to the railwaymen’s bar?”
and , after three pints of that cider so sweet ,
he threw down his crutches , and he danced on his feet .
chorus
i went down the lee road a friend for to see .
they had him in a madhouse in cork by the lee .
and , when i got there – the truth i do tell –
they had the poor bugger locked up in a cell!
says the doctor to him , “say these words , if you can :
’round the ragged rocks the ragged rascal ran’ ” –
“tell them i’m not crazy! tell them i’m not mad!
’twas only six pints of that cider i had!”
chorus
now a man died in the union by the name of mcnabb .
they washed him and laid him outside on a slab ,
and , after the coroner his measure did take ,
his wife brought him home to a bloody fine wake .
’twas about twelve o’clock , and the beer , it was high ,
when the corpse , he sat up , and he said , with a sigh ,
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